Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Pregnant Pause - Remembering the First Positive Test

A dear friend of mine from high school* got the coolest Christmas gift ever: a positive pregnancy test revealing the upcoming arrival of her first child. After reading about her reaction to the test, I wanted to share with her that she wasn't alone in the thoughts and feelings she experienced. However, being the verbose person I am, it turned into a post that I thought some other Finally Pregnant After Trying So Long moms might find encouraging. So here ya go:

I remember those four million tests. You'd wait for six minutes - just to be sure - only to see that it was still negative. Then when The One was there, it took only the time it takes to watch the color change to tell the test is working...and so is everything else.

It took us 2.5 years to get pregnant. I thought I was barren and we were actually to the stage of trying to decide whether we were going to get tested to find out exactly what was wrong where, or if we were just going to accept it and move on to the decision of adopting or fostering.

And yes, when that test does finally say what you've been trying to get the blasted thing to say all along, you are taken aback. It is a surprise. I think I just got used to seeing a negative test every month. We went to the nearby Target and bought another test to take just to make sure the one I had taken wasn't wrong. We'd had it around the house for a while, you know - it might have gone bad. That one was positive, too. It was official: we were finally pregnant. I couldn't stop grinning. And rechecking the tests to make sure they still showed positive results.

Then I made phone calls. A lot of phone calls.

I called my mom. He called his mom. I called my sister. I called my grandparents. It was 10:30 at night.

I didn't care. Wait; schmait.

All in all, congratulations my dear friend. I am so happy for you.

*I'm not naming names so as to preserve her privacy.


Kat said...

Thank you for this! Very kind. Good to know I am not alone.I also took multiple pregnancy tests even after it was positive, just in case all the rest had somehow been defective. And I still find myself fearing that at my 12 week appointment, it will have vanished, and there will be an empty womb. It's irrational, but those are the things I think. If I have symptoms, I worry. If I don't have symptoms, I worry. All things as they should be, I suppose.:)

crystal said...

Yes, Dearest, they are. It will seem very surreal for a very long time! Isn't it amazing how we being worrying about the Peanuts before we even meet them face to face? It's just the beginning of a Big Long Worry. =) The smiles and kisses and hugs and "I love you Mommy"'s will more than make up for it, though!

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